We all think that we are perfect drivers, and on the whole we are - NOT!,
An
article published in Readers Digest, detailed some of the most bizarre observations made by US lorry drivers - some of them amusing, some of them blood curdling!
BestCarHire takes a look at some of these, with the presumption that the truckers are male and that the observations were made while driving.
Changing Lanes
“One time on the 405 in L.A., I saw a woman switch from a very nice business outfit into a leotard. At one point, she was just sitting there in her undergarments.
(BestCarHire opinion - why did this guy spend so long taking in so much detail - he should have been keeping his beady eyes on the road ahead!)
Dishonourable Discharge
“A woman had her baby in the front seat next to her and was changing the baby’s diaper (nappy).
Shoot the Piano Player
“I saw a gentleman one time-in a Suburban-and he had a full-size piano keyboard sitting between the two seats. He was using his right hand to play it while he was going down the road.”
(BestCarHire opinion: Can't see anything wrong here at least it wasn't his organ he was playing with!)
Wooly Fools
“I’ve seen a lot of people sewing or knitting while they’re driving. And, you know, that takes two hands.”
(BestCarHire opinion: a traffic light jumper maybe?)
Bitch of a Driver
“Last week, I had a lady pass me at 70 miles an hour, and I looked down, and her dog-a little Jack Russell terrier-was standing on his back legs and resting his paws on the steering wheel.”
Hard to Swallow
“I was in Indiana or Ohio, and a woman was driving down the road, steering with her elbows, eating a bowl of soup. Now how in the world do you pull that off without spilling?”
You Couldn't Make it Up!
“What I see all the time is women steering with their knee, with the makeup mirror in one hand and a brush in the other, putting on eye shadow and blush and going 65 or 70 miles an hour. Usually they’re going back and forth across the line, running over and hitting the rumble strips. I blow the horn at them.”
hands.”
(BestCarHire opinion: by blowing your horn you've probably made this lady smudge her makeup and completely ruin her day. How bad do you feel now!)
Reading Between the Lines
“One guy actually had a paperback book taped to his steering wheel. It would move when he turned the wheel.”
Cruising for a Bruising
“What I see a lot of times, more with ladies, is they’ll be sitting cross-legged, driving with cruise control. All I can think is, How long is it going to take to get their legs uncrossed and get their foot down to the brake if they need to stop suddenly?”
'Armless Fun
“I’ve seen a lady with a cigarette in one hand, a cup of coffee in that same hand, driving with her elbows and talking on a cell phone at the same time.”
hands.”
(BestCarHire opinion: she is probably on the phone reporting the fact that she is being harassed by a lorry driver, driving right up her rear end!)
Cyber Driver
“The other day, I saw a guy with a cup of coffee between his legs, typing on his laptop computer and trying to drive. We hit a curve, and he wasn’t going with the curve. I had to tap my horn to alert him.”
From the small sample above it shows that women were more culpable than men. Now that could be for 2 reasons:
1. The observations were made by male chauvinist American lorry drivers, with nothing better to do when driving long-haul journeys.
2. That woman drivers pay more attention to what's going on elsewhere than what's heading towards them - we'll leave you to make your mind up on that one!
With thanks to Michelle Crouch from
Reader's Digest
About the Author
Malcolm McNeill is CEO of
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